God’s joy moves from unmarked box to unmarked box,
from cell to cell. As rainwater, down into flowerbed.
As roses up from the ground.
Now it looks like a plate of rice and fish,
now a cliff covered with vines,
now a horse being saddled.
It hides within these,
till one day it cracks them open.

-Rumi

It is hidden behind
the bright green eyes,
under unmanageable blond hair,
of one who the world says
is odd,
is different,
is slow.

But it is this boy
who lives his life
broken open each
day
with the joy
that we search for
but rarely see from
amid the busyness
of the world.

Where do you find the hidden joy of God?

And here are my favorite “snow angels” (very busy in the snow):

Mommy and Daughter hard at work:

The end result (notice the “zombie killing hat” @mgoodyear )

This is the life you’ve been given.
Well…it fits too tight
Like those jeans of yours
You know

The ones in the
Back of the closet

The ones you last wore
When you were seventeen
going on thirty.

The ones you tried on
Last week
When you felt that desire to
Make an exchange,
To return what you have
To relive those high school and
College days
That weren’t so good
To begin with.

Life has moved you on,
Has given to you
Its no returns,
No exchange policy
In the form of

A spouse,
A child
(Maybe two),
A home,
A faith
more mature
Than what you once had

Even so
You look during
Dark, quiet evenings
At the
“What could have beens”
And the
“If onlys”
And you tell the shadows
Of the past that you would like
To make an exchange

But not really.

It Is Good

begin: to come into existence; to bring into being¹

it started with nothingness
it was neither light nor dark,
it was neither hot nor cold,
it didn’t exist
except in the mind of the maker.

the maker thought,
considered,
and then spoke.
a word.

it began with a word,
it heard the word,
it became light,
it became warm,
it came into being.

and it was good.
yes, it was good.

but in time
it changed.
it listened to
the other,
it stopped hearing
the word.

it became a bit darker,
it became a bit cooler,
it began to listen to itself.

it was still good,
not perfect but still
good

the maker thought,
considered,
the word became
it
to restore,
to redeem,
to return.

and it is good,
yes, it is good.

1. Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary

Many times throughout this journey, this adventure of life, I have felt deeply lost along the way. Yet, at the same time, not really lost. Alone. Not feeling the guidance which I believed was needed at a particular point along the path. Knowing though, that in that darkness, the light was still there, only hidden. By my choice? Maybe. By another’s? Possibly. But for what reason? Why is it necessary for each one of us to experience our own “dark night of the soul”?

I have found in my life that those were the times that offered much more growth than I would have had otherwise. These times allowed me opportunities to pray with such fervency, “I believe, help my unbelief”¹. Isn’t that what happens to each of us when we feel such abandonment by God? When we feel we have been left in the midst of turmoil to survive by our own devices? We easily come to believe that we are to solve all our issues on out own when the reality is far different. It is in these times we need His guidance more than ever.

We’ve not been abandoned. We have been given opportunity. A grand opportunity in the midst of our cries of despair and crises. A chance to stretch our faith. A chance to fall back on Him who is always near though we may not be aware of that closeness. A chance to ask Him to help our unbelief.

Yes, we do have many times in our lives where we believe we are deeply lost along the way. But we do well to remember that we are not truly lost. It is in this darkness that we are given a chance to ask Him, not for what we want, but for what we need, which He already knows. But he waits patiently and quietly for us to approach and ask. And it will be given.

1. Mk 9:24

Form of a Poem

the supple softness and
gentle curve of the breast.
the river of flowing hair
tossed
over a small curve
of shoulder following
the spine’s curvature
leading in directions
unknown

One need not tell god everything about the people for whom one prays. Holding them one by one steadily before the mind and willing that God may have His will with them is the best, for God knows better than we what our friends need, yet our prayer releases His power, we know not how.¹

1. Laubach, Frank C., Letters by a Modern Mystic

the mirror stands as a testament to
imperfectly reflect that which is real,
the surface reflects what we need to do
we see dimly, looking hard for his seal
behind the veil which separates the worlds
of here and now and of eternity
which, in part, we are shown by his heralds,
glimpses brief ’til called to see completely,
our journey is not a means to an end
rather it is the end within itself
remember what is reflected will lend
chance to see reality of oneself
               hidden behind the veil for all to see
               what the reflection offers us to be

Oh…and once I got home….backyard is now a lake and I've a small river out front…. #

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